Blame It On The Rain

Much like with light and sound, water is the third and only element garunteed to distress a baby Tamarin monkey. Because of this limitation, Trump has found himself in some high waters^ as of late. Contiously, Trump has gotten a lot of flak for the inexplicable (to those who don't know the truth) way that he behaves around water since his inauguration.

Scroll on for some examples:

Rain forces Trump to cancel his appearance at a war memorial

Trump leaves Melania in the rain

Solutions were suggested and tested, but nothing worked...

...until Trump finally found the answer to his rain dilemna. He now wears a temporary toupee for all his moist appearances

**I guess they aren't wrong about that toupee after all

                   It was all because of                  

• 
  
  
                                                                                                                                                                            "NO, NO, NO!" -DJT
  

  light/sound sensitivity

  
  
    Trump wears the baby Tamarin monkey on his head. It lays on its belly facing forward with its head tucked downwards because it enjoys long naps and avoiding light, which it is extremely sensitive to.
  
  Other than having an glorious orange coat that perfectly matches the presidents complexion, these baby monkeys are known for being particularly docile, which is one reason why Trump chose to wore it over the more traditional baby black bearded saki monkey worn by others.
  
  Light and sound are two of the three elements known to rouse these little furbabies, which is why during this rally he became particularly agitated at the sudden re-introduction of monkey alarming light. During the moment captured in the gif above, the president must have felt his hair beggining to wake up in protest to the lights being shined and crowd yelling.
  
  Alarmed that his hair would get up and walk away while he was being broadcast telivision, he had no choice but to momentarily abuse the stage technicians and scream at them to turn the light off. He knew the sound of his own booming voice would stun his hair-monkey long enough to turn the lights back off.

Kaiau with a baby black bearded saki monkey, Posto Awã, Awã Community, Brazil.

Wearing monkeys on your head is tight

For many communities in south America, wearing monkeys on your head is completely normal. Many different Awã Communities in Brazil as well as communities from the Peruvian Amazon have been documented regarding their closs relationship and complimentary bond with monkeys, many of which love to travel on their heads.

It's too bad Trump's consistent efforts at making America more a open minded and inclusive group isn't paying off. With a little understanding, he might be able to reveal the truth about himself to us all.


Building a wall between himself and the only people that could understand him isn't helping either.


Scroll down to see how happy everyone who is out of hair-hiding is:

Gazielly with her family's pet capuchin monkey

With the exception of the small tamarins (#docile), many of the monkeys Hamilton James observed were on strings, though they were allowed free range of the community. Tiracmbu Awã communtiy, Maranhão, Brazil

Yoina with her pet Saddle-back Tamarin

Machiguenga Community,Peruvian Amazon

Imuniin with her pet baby black bearded saki.

Awã Community of Posto Awã in Maranhão, Brazil

NAVIGATION